Frieda and the Rivals

 
 

Frieda seems to have been "everybody's friend", but Hugo and Erik were the two boys that stood closest to her. Did they become rivals?

Hugo was very shy and did not seem able to tell Frieda he loved her. But at times he drowned her in small presents, perhaps hoping that they would speak for him. Frieda is very touched and thanks him, but does not take the cue. She writes to him as to a dear brother, who is a bit lazy in writing back.

In 1922 Hugo visits Frieda and her family in Berne. Frieda has become a Salvation Army officer, and according to SA rules could marry only another SA officer. Perhaps Hugo came to the conclusion that Frieda was lost for him. He sent her a beautiful rosary. Frieda's mother Leonarda says that Hugo probably regards Frieda as a sort of nun.


Erik seems to have been the same sort as Hugo. He was also very shy and wouldn't even speak to her, but Frieda broke his silence by asking him to teach her Swedish. From the fall of 1923 they met for lessons once a week. They became more and more close, especially after Erik's conversion and decision to become a SA officer.

Of course this made tongues wag, and many people seemed to think that is was because he wanted to marry Frieda that Erik had taken this step. Erik is very annoyed by this gossip, but nevertheless carries out his plan to enter Training. They never talk of love. He leaves Berne for London in August, 1924.


How did this affect Hugo? It seemed he had given Frieda up. But some time in Spring, 1924, he confides to Frieda that he also has felt the call to service as a SA officer. Frieda is delighted, but warns him that he must be sure of his purpose. Only if it is a genuine call and he wants to serve as an evangelist will it hold.

Hugo, who now lives in the USA, resumes writing to Frieda. He sends her thick letters – even in Swedish, which she now can read! – and more presents. He asks Frieda how old Erik is. Frieda is surprised that Hugo doesn't know, since the two boys have met several times. Perhaps Hugo did know. It was his way of reminding Frieda that Erik, 20, is only a youngster, whilst Hugo and Frieda are 25 already.

Frieda, in her letters to Hugo, speaks of her concern for his spiritual growth. No words of love are ever mentioned in Frieda's letters.


Erik finishes training and is sent to Hamilton, Scotland, and later (October, 1925) to Berlin, Germany. During this time he corresponds with Frieda.

Many years later Erik gave me (his oldest son Sven) the impression that Hugo, at the same time, was courting Frieda rather heavily, and that Frieda had in some way or other let this fact be known to Erik. But Erik wouldn't let himself be rushed. He had to make quite sure – to himself, to Frieda and to the gossips? – that his decision to become a SA officer was not dependant on Frieda, but on the strong conviction of a call from God.


Hugo enters Training College in New York City in 1925, but after January, 1925, there is a sudden drop in the frequency of Hugo's letters. Frieda is annoyed.

"You know Hugo, it really hurts me that you should stop writing so suddenly."
After that Hugo seems to write occasional letters, but not as before. Was he losing interest, ill, just busy; or had he met someone else? We do not know.

On October 9, 1926, Frieda, very excited, tells him that she and her Dad have been given two month's leave to visit her brothers in Boston. Frieda hopes it will be possible to stop and visit Hugo of their way.

What happend then? As has been said we do not know. Perhaps this was the time when Hugo proposed and was brushed off? Or perhaps he told Frieda that he had started on another relationship? Maybe they did not meet at all, and Frieda was so sorry that she did not write to Hugo any more?

Or she did write, but Hugo did not save those letters? All we know is that Hugo never could quite forget Frieda. He saved the letters, and many years later he wanted to talk some words with Frieda's only child, me, Sven Wickberg.


At any rate Frieda was now alone and must have at times felt rather lonely. Hugo was in America and did not write any more. Her brothers were also in America. Her father, whom she had taken care of since her mother died in 1924, remarried in 1926 and was sent as Territorial Commander to South Africa. Erik was in Berlin. And she herself was transferred to England as Assistant at Social Services.

Erik later told me that he corresponded diligently with Frieda during this period. But not one word of love was written. In one of his manuscripts Erik tells that Frieda had turned down proposals from at least two others during this period. Once she stopped answering his letters, but he persuaded her to resume the correspondence.

And the time passed by. Frieda, five years older than Erik – what did she think of this? We only know that when Erik made up his mind, at last, in 1928 she sent the telegram: "Delighted" (although, as she smilingly told him later, he didn't really deserve it. And to this he could only agree).  /Press here for details on this!/




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